Recently I cleared out my laptop of a lot of rubbish. I ended up reading through a load of old mail, testimonials and interaction with people over the past few years. It actually got me down a little…
This is were I wear my heart on my sleeve for you and tell you how I was honestly feeling. You see the title ‘The Blackbelt Mastermind‘ was never about me, it’s about YOU. It’s about you becoming the Master of your Mind. I open my heart to you and your judgement so that you can see my flaws and all that I am – Perfectly imperfect and in so being imperfectly perfect! I am simply human, just like you – And I tell you this so as to convey that just like you, we both have a choice…. Like one of my favorite quotes from my book..
‘A blackbelt is simply a white belt who never gave up.’
I believe life is a journey and the more I learn the more I realize I have to learn!
Anyhow … I read over long emails and correspondences I had with people and noticed that some had not really made an effort to reply or interact much. Some of these were clients and some I would have considered friends. I was actually quite hurt by this and I pondered on what I had said to warrant no response from some or why with some others they seemed to disregard past events and or history and could so easily forget and even somehow seemingly ‘distort’ the past.
The more I focused on this the more depressed and even somewhat angry I felt.
I debated in my head and questioned why would they behave like this? What had I done to warrant such a dismissive, unappreciative response? I asked myself these questions.
‘Was it something within me, or some mannerism, gesture, look etc etc that caused them to take me more for granted than someone else?’
‘Was there something about me that had the effect of making some people treat me in a dismissive manner but instead relish the attention of another?’
Then I noticed….. Yup, I was doing exactly what I tell you NOT to do!
I was focusing on the negative. I was asking the negative questions that can only result in answers from that direction! I have said it before and I will say it again. You get more of what you focus on! We have to be MINDFUL!
Us humans possess a great gift. The gift of conscious awareness. Unlike other animals, you and I can be aware of our thoughts and therefore change them. What a huge gift this is!
I noticed that actually there were VERY few of these negative examples. In fact a lot of the time it is me that doesn’t have time to give long elaborate replies to emails and 99% of my emails are positive, warm and very responsive. Sometimes too much so!
I can over analyse and self criticize as well as the next person BUT what I can also do (something I have learnt and practice daily) is I can choose to stop that and think differently, more clearly and beneficially!
Because the other way get’s you NOWHERE except hurt! Trust me!
Yes, throughout life people will treat you bad, disrespect you and let you down. But let your God (whoever or whatever that is for you) deal with that because hate, anger, jealousy and resentment will only consume you.
Goodness is about character and integrity and about how we treat others.
How people treat you is their Karma, how you react is yours.
That is our choice and our gift.
I decided to instead look for reasons outside of me as to why these people might behave this way…. and there are so many. We cannot possibly know all that is going on is someone else’s life or their head. They might be busy -distracted – have something more pressing – have a different understanding of things – have more serious issues to deal with… etc etc.
Look for the good in people not the bad.
Focus on that and you will find it and in fact it will come flooding in once you open your eyes and your mind to it.
This does not mean you or I have to be or indeed are a push over. In fact I think turning the other cheek and acknowledging we are not always going to be acknowledged takes strength.
You can be there, help others and do it without wanting or expecting anything in return. That is a great gift, not just for the receiver but also the giver.
I got over my little sulk and back on track. At the end of the day I know that is just my ego talking and I have a choice. I choose freely and consciously to focus in a new way.
I choose to focus on being the best me without expecting anything.
I believe that’s what life is about. Being consciously aware we are in this together. We are all interconnected.
Its a journey and its about planting the seeds for others.
Plant those trees without expectation of sitting in their shade.
My heart is fuller now because of it and I trust you will join me and do the same!
I open my journey and my heart to you,
lets go plant some trees!
Love Danielle xx
If you choose also to Change your Mind and think differently join me HERE on the 24th Oct Dublin for my next Breakthrough Bootcamp!
Get in touch HERE! You know I always love to hear from you 😉
Your Mind & Life Coach – Wicklow, Dublin, Ireland & Worldwide through Skype.